Adult hot These Are The Words. - lookmybody - lookmybody

At the end of December 2015, I had a writing streak.  For some reason - literally out of the blue - feelings I had been holding onto came rushing out through a series of "poems".  I don't like that word, "poems".  Really, what developed was an arrangement of words through which I conveyed feelings and memories. 

The words just kept coming and coming, so I wrote them down in a Word document.  And then I asked myself - What am I going to do with these words?

This year, I wanted to challenge myself to live outside of my shell  So, I decided to share my favourite pieces through my personal social media accounts.  But, since I want the entire assortment to be collected in once place, I have chosen to post all of the "poems" on this blog.

Over the next 29 days, you will be subjected treated to a poem per day.  I hope that the words that I post can mean to you even just a fraction of what they have come to mean to me.

Everything about this is personal to me, and so I hope that you enjoy reading as much as I have enjoyed preparing for this month.  I hope that these words reach who they are meant to reach, and touch who they are meant to touch.

xoxo,

-J

©

Adult hot Scared Part II. - lookmybody - lookmybody

I'm shaking.

At the beginning of this month, I talked about pushing myself out of my comfort zone, and trying something different.  I have been preparing to do just that, not by writing an academic article, but by sharing something very important to me on this blog starting February first.  I thought I would share part of it on my Tumblr blog as a trial run, and so far two people have commented saying that they were touched by it.

And now I'm shaking, because I am reminded of two things:

1. I am not alone.  I do not feel the way I feel alone, I do not face the challenges I face alone.  Other people feel the same way.  And that is making me emotional.

2. By sharing myself with others, I can at the very least remind them that they are not alone either.  And that makes me emotional, because that means I matter.  The things I do, the things I say, they matter.  And that is also making me emotional.

Whenever I share personal stories or feelings, my entire body begins to shake.  I don't know what it is - probably anxiety taking over.  But right now, I am also happy.  And anxious.  And scared.  I am about to push myself out of my comfort zone, and do something I would have never dreamed of doing a month ago.

It's coming.  February first.  I hope you like it.

Cheers to shaking.
Cheers to breaking outside of the box.
Cheers to me calming down enough to be able to sleep.

- xoxo, Jayy

Adult hot Propping Up The Sky. - lookmybody - lookmybody

 Life is busy.  And stressful.  And that doesn't change after you finish school.  I think it actually gets busier, especially because you no longer have a winter/spring/summer/fall break to look forward to.

For the past few weeks, I've been running around as though the sky were caving in on me.  It's been hectic both personally and professionally, and somehow in the midst of it all, I've turned into a cynical little pessimist. 

I think we all have those "sky is falling" moments, where we feel as though life is raining down on us, and we're spending our time running for cover.  I think it's important that we expect these moments, and view them as opportunities for growth rather than opportunities to sulk or complain.  

It's all about outlook, and how we handle situations.  We can do one of two things - dodge the pieces of the sky as they rain down, or focus on propping up the sky.  And there's no universally right or wrong choice - sometimes it's better to try to fix something that is coming apart at the seams, sometimes it's better to let it fall apart, and then work on rebuilding it.  The trick is to know what is right for the situation at hand.

Right now, I'm propping up the sky.  It's not time for me to give up and rebuild, so I'm working to fix what I already have.  It's a lot of work, but that's kind of the beauty of it.  Things might be caving in, but I'm determined to hold them together until it's time to rebuild.  

I guess I'm not such a pessimist after all.

Cheers to the sky.  May we always have the strength to do what is necessary when it begins to cave in on us.

- xoxo, Jayy

Adult hot Whipped Coconut Oil (& How it Saved My Life) - lookmybody - lookmybody

Today I'm returning to my DIY roots to share with you the easiest, laziest DIY in the history of DIYs.

I don't know who thought of whipped coconut oil, but I'd like to give them an award.  Whipped coconut oil has become a winter hair staple for me, because of how versatile and simple this stuff is to use.

Now I know you're wondering why even go to the trouble of whipping coconut oil.  Well, if you live in a colder climate, you know what winter does to your coconut oil.  I have gone to use coconut oil in the dead of winter, and found that my coconut oil is rock solid - not fun.  For me, whipped coconut oil is easier to use on my face, body and hair, as the consistency is smoother and more like moisturizer.  And with Valentine's day coming up, whipped coconut oil is one of the most versatile (wink) gifts you could give to anyone you love.  Literally.  Everyone needs coconut oil.  Unless you're allergic, in which case I pity you.

I digress.

Are you ready to whip up a batch a fluffy goodness?

You will need:

Solid Coconut oil.
Hand mixer.
Bowl.
Spatula.
Storage container.







Instructions:

1. Spoon your solid coconut oil into a bowl of your choosing.  Just dump the whole jar in.  It does have to be solid, or it won't work.
2. Stick the hand mixer into the bowl.
3. Turn the hand mixer on.
4. Mix for 5-8 minutes (or until mixture is white and creamy).
5. Spoon into storage container.
6. Enjoy light and fluffy coconut goodness.

And you're done!

Hope this recipe rocked your world as much as it rocked mine!

- xoxo, Jayy

Adult hot 41 Ways I Cope With the Winter Blues (That Don't Involve Shopping) - lookmybody - lookmybody

I actually do sit by the lake in winter.  Not for long, but I actually do it.
 If you live by a large body of water, try it.
You get all the soothing sounds of the water, without the annoying
noise from other people that you get during the summer.

1. Journal.
2. Text a friend.
3. Ignore phone calls.
4. Sleep in.
5. Take a nap.
6. Disconnect from the world.
7. Reconnect with old friends.
8. Spend the day in bed.
9. Read a favourite book of poetry. (Bonus points for doing this while doing number 2).
10. Watch cartoons on YouTube.
11. Update Spotify playlists.
12. Make a smoothie.
13. Go to bed early.
14. Enjoy the sunrise.
15. Clean.
16. Burn candles.
17. Clean while burning candles.
18. Eat breakfast.
19. Blog.
20. Drink tea.
21. Get nails done.
22. Grab coffee with a friend.
23. Take vitamins.
24. Turn the heat up.
25. Sit by the lake. 
26. Don't freeze while sitting by the lake.
27. Go to the lake after work and watch the sunset over the skyline.
28. Try a face mask.
29. Take a shower.
30. Deep-condition.
31. Make body butter.
32. Trim hair.
33. Cook dinner (or breakfast or lunch).
34. Bake cookies.
35. Listen to new music.
36. Watch a new show.
37. Binge-watch an old show.
38. Clean out your closet.
39. Get rid of clutter.
40. Get crafty.
41. Sit in silence.

This started off as "10 Ways to Cope With the Winter Blues", but as you can see it has progressed far past that.

Do nothing.

Enjoy the little things.

There are lots of ways to be kind to yourself.

Love yourself this winter.

I also take Snapchat selfies while sleeping,
 and send them to friends just for kicks.

xoxo, Jayy

Adult hot "Let's Talk". - lookmybody - lookmybody

If you live in Canada, you'll have heard about "Bell Let's Talk", an fundraising initiative to address the stigma surrounding mental health.  The campaign is led by Bell Canada, one of the leading telecommunication companies in this country.  Every January Bell launches their "Let's Talk" campaign, and every January I consider shutting down my social media accounts because I just can't deal with the hypocrisy.

Image Source

Let me be clear - I am all for raising money to support mental health research and service provision in Canada. I am definitely for challenging and eradicating the stigma surrounding mental health in our society. God knows we need it.  What I'm against is the way that everyone on my Facebook friends list decides to try on the social justice warrior armour for the day, campaigning against stigma for 24 hours, before returning to endorsing ableism, sexism, racism, and every other -ism on the planet.  I can't deny that Bell Let's Talk is successful as a fundraising initiative, but in my (very strong) opinion, it fails incredibly in the 'challenging stigma' department.

I feel that Bell Let's Talk (and all of the other social media movements of this nature) is an opportunity for people to hop onto a social justice fad.  You know, tweet a few times, use the popular hashtag, look good for the day, and then go back to living life the way you always have.  Stigma surrounding mental health can't be challenged and eradicated in a day - it's an entity that has evolved over decades.  Talking about stigma isn't enough - we have to actually get up and do something about it.

I'm challenging myself (and anyone else who would like to join me) to stop talking, and start doing something about stigma.  Challenging stigma goes beyond tweeting, texting and talking - it means challenging the ways that we think and talk about mental health challenges and the people who live with them.  And it shouldn't just happen once a year - challenging stigma needs to become a part of our daily routine for the rest of our lives.

 Cheers to challenging,

xoxo, Jayy.

Adult hot #Minimalist Style - lookmybody - lookmybody

I've been addicted to Polyvore lately.  Check out some of my favourite sets!

Minimalist Style by jenell20 on polyvore.com

Adult hot Scared. - lookmybody - lookmybody

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One of my goals for this year is to write an article and submit it to an academic journal.  Today I took a look at the journal I would like to submit to, and I very seriously considered scratching that off my to-do list.  Everyone who has been published in that journal is either a professor or a PhD graduate, meanwhile I'm fresh out of grad school, and I'm still recovering from that trying experience.

I've mentioned several times that I don't want to be mediocre, I want to be great.  But being great takes some serious guts.  It's easy to set goals, but when it comes to tackling them it often means facing a fear, which has never really been my strong suit.  I'm more of a 'go with the flow' kind of girl, which means that facing my fears goes against my nature.

I want to push myself out of my comfort zone, and try new things so I can grow as a person.  So while I don't think I'll be submitting an article to that specific journal, I think it's still important to find another journal that meets my criteria.  Even though I'm going to alter my target a bit, I think it's still important to try and meet my goal.

What's my point?  I'm scared.  But I'm going to do it anyhow.

Cheers,

Jayy

Adult hot Diary of the Defiant Dougla. - lookmybody - lookmybody

In early 2015, I created a blog called The Diary of the Defiant Dougla.  My goal was to make this blog a space for me to share more personal details about my journey as a mixed-race female.  That blog fell by the wayside after I finished school, but I think the posts from that blog are worth keeping.

I've decided to merge that blog with this one to preserve those posts, and to allow me to turn this blog into a space where I can post more freely.  The posts have been imported, and you can find them by clicking here.

I hope you enjoy!

xoxo, Jay, The Defiant Dougla

Adult hot Happy. - lookmybody - lookmybody

Happy 2016 friends!

While I'm not one to make New Years resolutions, this year I've decided to make one.

I resolve to be happy.

That's right folks!  I'm taking the happy out of 'Happy New Year' and extending it to each and every one of the 365 days of the year.

While I don't have a concrete plan for how I'm going to do this, I know my journey to happy will go hand in hand with my journey to minimalism.  By living with less clutter, I hope to make room for other things in life that make me happy.

I've been out of school for 6 months now, and to be honest I've forgotten what it is like to have spare time.  Since I started university 5 years ago, I have spent all of my time working or going to school, and any hobbies I used to have fell by the wayside.  Now I have the chance to rediscover those hobbies, along with some new ones.

I look forward to seeing where this journey will take me, and I hope to remember to blog about it along the way!

Cheers to the old me trying new things.

xoxo, Jayy